There was a time when I was diagnosed with PTSD, which stemmed from military service. The mental illness took a toll on my life and health. I went through two divorces.
My passion for running and healthy living just stopped. I gained a lot of weight. I became pre-diabetic, and my blood pressure was very high. I became a different person.
I felt like a monster. I stopped taking care of myself, which caused even more damage. I felt ugly and scary all over, inside, and out.
However, I did bounce back and regained my health and well-being. And today, I want to let other sufferers of (PTSD) know they are not alone. And that there are hope and healing power of telling my trauma story.
From Where & How It All Started
During my first marriage, I was deployed to Iraq.
While over there, I found out that my husband had a girlfriend and spent my money. I was so broken. I went home for a while to try to sort affairs out, but it turned out to be a mess as well.
I could not believe someone who said he loved me would do this to me. This was so traumatizing for me. The marriage ended up in a divorce. This hardship, along with the ugliness of war, took its toll on me.
This was when my PTSD started creeping into my life. I had no clue I was under attack by this life-threatening mental illness. I thought I was happy and found happiness and got married again.
The Suffering Continues
I had married again, but I was still struggling with my PTSD. This, unfortunately, ended my second marriage. My husband just could not understand the hardships of having a relationship with someone diagnosed with PTSD.
He had enough, and my damaged mental state ran him out. This was so devastating for me. I felt like a total failure. I said to myself that I could not even hold up a marriage. This added more fuel to the fire burning within me.
My PTSD manifested slowly over time, and I wasn’t aware of how much I was changing. People had to tell me that something was not right with me. My patience in everyday life grew shorter and shorter.
I got so frustrated over things when they did not work out or go my way. I thought everyone was out to get me. I felt attacked every day. I honestly believed my life was cursed because of the things I had done.
I thought GOD is punishing me for joining the Army, going to war, having an abortion, and my sinful nature. Every person around me became an enemy and irritable to me. I ended up hating people.
The Situation Got Even Worse
After my condition worsened, I shut out everyone, including my family and friends. I made death threats to certain family members and friends. To avoid going to jail, I was forced to attend an anger management class. The class only seemed to make me angrier, to be honest.
I thought about how I could die by suicide. I thought about it every day and often. I closed myself inside my home and did not want to leave, ever. I didn’t want to see a human.
I became physically sick due to my mental state and developed disabling migraines. I felt that no one cared about me. I felt left out since most family and friends thought I was crazy.
I was so angry that no one understood me and tried to help me. I felt so very alone. I felt that reaching out for help was a weakness. I felt ashamed and scared. I didn’t know where to start, where I can go for help.
I felt so hopeless and helpless that no one was able to help me. I felt the whole world was against me, so why even get help.
After Constant Pain, Things Begin To Change
As a Veteran, I heard about maybe being able to use the VA.
I knew very little about the VA. I usually only heard horror stories about going to the VA. I did not trust going to the VA. One of my good friends, a Mental Health Provider, talked with me about getting evaluated for PTSD.
The turning point for me was the unhealthy amount of weight I gained. I did not like the way I looked and felt. I was too young to have the health problems I was having.
Also, it was the failed marriages and relationships I experienced. I was not a happy person, and it was like walking on eggshells. I finally got the courage to talk with a professional about PTSD. I started working on my own condition, I realized that the only way I can win over PTSD is by fighting back.
My consistency, an itch for change, and my own betterments caused me to change and gather the scattered pieces of me that I had lost over the years to rebuild myself back.
Moreover, with the help of many professionals and people who cared about me, I could get the help I needed to go on my recovery and healing journey.
I’m telling my story to you all because I don’t want anyone to give up or lose hope. There’s always a way. No matter how hard the circumstances may seem, it all gets better if you just don’t give up.
A Guide To Introduction
In this case the set of sections that come before the body of the book are known as the front matter.
When the book is divided into numbered chapters, by convention the introduction and any other front-matter sections are unnumbered.
Keeping the concept of the introduction the same, different documents have different styles to introduce the written text.
If a Userguide is written, the introduction is about the product. In a report, the introduction gives a summary about the report contents.